We were introduced to “Rules of the Game” in 1982 during Marshall Thurber’s three-day life-changing program, Money & You: Management by Agreement.
We later realized that these “Rules” weren’t just for our class, they were agreements about our relationships in life that would lead us to truly fulfilling, authentic and joy-filled lives. A group of us business folks got together to further develop these agreements for ourselves and then began using them in our business and personal lives.
Every month for 20 years we spent a day together to share what we learned along the way. To say that living with these agreements was transformational is an understatement.
We offer you these Revolutionary Agreements for you to adopt or adapt for ever-more satisfying relationships with yourself, your colleagues and your family and friends. To help you apply agreements effectively in every aspect of your life, Marian offers one-on-one Enriching Relationships Coaching™. Contact Marian directly for a free consultation to determine if the timing is right for you to enter into a coaching relationship.
The world works by agreements, whether spoken or unspoken, conscious or unconscious. We all have agreements: agreements with our co-workers, with our spouses, siblings, parents and children, with people we know and even those we don’t. Perhaps most importantly, we have agreements with ourselves. Consciously applying the agreements we’ve developed positively influences our relationships in profound ways.
We have enjoyed working together as partners in life since 1984. People always marvel at how a husband and wife can work in business together. We can’t imagine better partners. And yet we attract other great business partners too! We also have a terrific relationship with our 28-year old son and did throughout his teenage years (well, most of them anyway.) We owe much of our success in life and especially in our relationships to living by the Agreements that were formulated more than 30 years ago in our living room.
When challenged with relationship issues in our 24th year of marriage, Marian sought out advice from the Agreements and saved our marriage by applying the Revolutionary Agreement to “see the best in myself and others.” For all the intimate details, enjoy reading A Gratitude Journal for a Healthy Marriage.
At the core of a happy life is living your true values. Having a set of agreements with yourself that guides you to put your values into action is powerful. We offer a starting point with the Revolutionary Agreements. Adopt them for yourself or create your own. Stay true to yourself.
For a powerful, personal experience of the Agreements, treat yourself to “Focus on Today” at the end of each of the 12 Agreement chapters in Revolutionary Agreements. These exercises will help you to become aware of how to live an authentic life filled with gratitude.
For a more spiritual experience of the Agreements, enjoy the beautiful personal reflections at the back of each of the 12 chapters in Living Grace, by Reverend Martie McMane.
When it feels as though our values are out of sync with our organization’s mission or teammates, stress can mount and block our creativity, productivity, and potential contribution to the world. Having a set of agreements with your work team can help you to discover and align along common values, greatly reducing the stress and struggle often found in the workplace. We offer a starting point with Revolutionary Agreements. Use them as a launch pad for building your team’s own set of Agreements and enjoy successful relationships at work.
For sample Team Agreements, click on sample customized agreements.
Here’s what the Director of Systems Development at a major cable company said seven months after his organization implemented their first set of agreements:
“I can say that I am in love again with my career and assert that the Agreements are the best tools for stress reduction I have ever found.” [more]
Consultant Joanne Cohen has designed and facilitated corporate team-building, leadership development and stress management workshops for years using various versions of the Revolutionary Agreements. Here’s what she’s learned:
When these Agreements are practiced diligently, people can be more proactive and less reactive to the daily challenges inside and outside the work environment.” [more]
For sample Team Agreements, click sample customized agreements.
Marian remembers her shift from trying to please everyone all of the time (impossible!) after a friend posed this question many years ago: “Would you rather have a hundred friends who like you because of who you pretend to be…or a few who like (or truly love) you for who you are?” She discovered that relationships can be oh-so-joyful when she shows up as her authentic self! At the root of so much of her stress had been trying to be what she thought others expected of her.
We have both experienced that when you practice being your authentic self with a few, you will eventually attract many into your life who like — and love — you for the special person you are.
The Revolutionary Agreements are a powerful guide for dealing with the constant changes in my life, empowering me to live the truth of who I am, to accept others for who they are, and to feel deep gratitude for the opportunities that continue to unfold in my miraculous life.
– Josephine Gross, Ph.D., Editor-in-Chief of Networking Times
What’s so distinctly “revolutionary”
about Revolutionary Agreements
is its head-heart connection.
It is a profound collection of practical things to do
to be all we desire, dream and deserve.
– John Milton Fogg, author,
The Greatest Networker in the World
Our revolutionary strategies transform stress and struggle into freedom and joy in these significant areas:
Find us on
- Archived Newsletters
- Blessings in Disguise
- Give and Receive Thanks
- Health & Wellness
- Honor our Choices
- Lighten Up!
- Listen with Heart
- Look Within When I React
- Respect our Differences
- See the Best in Self/Others
- Social Entrepreneurship
- Speak Truth with Compassion